Costa Rica – A Nasty Surprise

Our second trip was called the ‘Beuno Casto combo’. We did more zip lining, another horse ride and a water slide though the jungle. In Bristol, we call a slide a slider. Anyone from outside of Bristol finds this mad, but to Brisotolian’s it makes total sense; you slide down the slider.

Anyway, I have digressed; firstly, we did the zip lining. It was very well organised, Ollie, myself, Lou and Mike decided to wait until last because then we wouldn’t have to wait at the end, turned out that was a good decision as we ended one zip line and immediately started another. The first line was the best, you came out on the zip line and suddenly the canopy beneath you disappeared and you could see just how blooming high you were. The trees looked tiny and the floor was so far away.  Let me tell you, things like that really make you feel alive!

After zip lining we did the water slider, Ollie, being a new swimmer was a little anxious about the flume, but fair play to him, because he did it. I felt very proud of him. The water was freezing compared to the warmth of the mid-day sun and goodness knows what was in there, but it was fun all the same. I went first and then Ollie followed. I didn’t make it to the end of the flume and had to truffle shuffle out to the splash pool at the end.

I waited for Ollie with Louise and to our delight, we saw Ollie run down the bottom of the flume with the little rubber ring around his waist resembling the crazy frog and we laughed our heads off. We decided not to go for the second run (mainly because of the long walk back to the top of the slide) and got changed into our dry clothes.

After the water slider we went for a horse ride. For want a better word, my horse was an absolute plonker. It wasn’t responding to me, no matter how many times I pulled it reigns to try and guide it to the main track. Instead my horse took me on a lovely ‘scenic’ route of the gutter as I got whipped in the face with branches and twigs.

Meanwhile, Ollie, aka Frankie Detorri was trotting along on the main pathway as I fell out with my horse, who I decided must have been deaf or didn’t speak very good English because he wasn’t responding to my polite requests to move over and then was ignoring my profanities asking why he hated me so much. The horse continued to ruin my life for the whole hour long journey and I have to say I was pleased to get off the damn thing. I couldn’t knock the horse for its perseverance in sweltering heat, dragging itself, plus me up the hills but I could’ve done without the branch scratches on my legs.  

Already hot, narked off, and hungry, I was a force to be reckoned with. The dust that all of the horses had churned up combined with the humidity had kicked started my asthma into full swing so I really wasn’t a happy bunny. The tour guide announced that we had a fifteen-minute walk in the noon heat, without my inhaler and some water, to make our way to a waterfall. We went up and downhill, then down and uphill, up another hill and down another hill, until we found the ‘waterfall’ which to be honest was a shower of disappointment in my opinion.

Not only was I seriously grouchy, but the ‘waterfall’ was similar to one Ollie I had seen in the Brecon Beacons (South Wales). I muttered under my breath and Ollie and I decided to force ourselves to pretend to be happy for the somewhat pathetic photo opportunity. I don’t want to sound like an obnoxious twonk but after visiting Victoria Falls, this pitiful excuse for a waterfall angered me. Perhaps it would have been better in the wet season, but at this point, I really couldn’t think beyond what I was seeing.

I was happy to leave but didn’t enjoy the walk up and down, up and down those steps. I was so blasé that when people pointed out monkeys, I was thinking, ‘Yeah, seen them before’! I felt annoyed with myself that I was taking it all with a pinch of salt, when really it was quite the opposite, but my body was telling me otherwise.

After we left the horses and waterfall, we headed to another spa. There was a mud bath there which reminded me of ‘The Sims’, Ollie and I decided to pass on that one, mainly due to being blasted with a freezing cold hose pope to get the mud off. 

Again, as of course is tradition, we headed to the bar. We ordered a ‘Sex in the Volcano’ which is basically Costa Rica’s answer to a sex on the beach; when in Rome and all that. Armed with drinks, we headed down to the spa and entered a hot spring. We were loving life, enjoying the volcanic springs until Ollie looked in his drink and saw something black in the bottom of it.

The spa area was shaded by trees, so Ollie assumed that it was a leaf that had landed in his drink. Upon closer inspection, he realised that it was in fact a tiny maggot. Instead of being disgusted (like I probably should have been), I have to admit, I laughed my head off.

It probably wouldn’t have been so funny if it was in my drink. Anyway, Ollie marched out of the pool, like a man on a rampage looking for a bar man and to his horror, the maggot started moving. This made him almost chunder and made me laugh even more. I pointed out that a whole maggot was better than half a maggot; that didn’t go down too well, but he handed the drinks back saying we weren’t paying and from my point of view we saved $14 which is winning.

By |2017-02-07T20:46:44+00:00February 7th, 2017|Travel|